You spend the night tossing and turning, with so many questions and things you don’t understand. Being a disciple of Jesus is sometimes both easy and hard. You recall Jesus’ words. " I am the bread of life, he who comes to me shall not hunger, and he who believes in me shall never thirst….Truly, truly I say to you, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of man and drink his blood, you have no life in you; he who eats my flesh and drinks my blood has eternal life, and I will raise him up at the last day….It is the Spirit that gives life, the flesh is of no avail; the words I have spoken to you are Spirit and life."
Your confused thoughts seek clarity. I must hunger and thirst for Jesus…how will I eat his flesh and drink his blood? I want eternal life…it is the Spirit that gives life. How? What am I missing? I don’t understand.
You get up and decide that some fresh air will help clear your mind. You look up at the stars. The sky is so vast; there are definitely mysteries about the stars you don’t understand, yet you believe they are real and exist. As you stare at the stars, you suddenly hear an all-too-familiar voice, “ Are you having trouble sleeping?”
You are surprised to see Jesus standing right beside you. You let out a big sigh, “Yes, you could say that. My thoughts keep waking me up.”
“Anything I can help you with?” Jesus asks.
“Jesus, when you called me to follow you, you knew I was not the smartest person. I know you are the Messiah and your words are true, but I feel so stupid that I don't understand everything. I try to recall your words at night so I don’t forget them, but there's this feeling deep inside me that tells me they mean something more.”
"My friend, I chose you because you listen not only with your ears but also with your heart. Your heart is so beautiful and capable of more than you can imagine. The truths I share are beyond what anyone can fully understand. Little by little, I will reveal more to you. What doesn’t make sense today will make sense one day. Your faith can embrace mysteries your mind cannot. A heart that trusts is more valuable than all the knowledge in the world. I have so much to offer you that this world never could."
Jesus puts his arm around you and gives you a good squeeze. Then he kisses your forehead and says, “Go get some rest. Trust in my timing.”
It was that kiss of peace that calmed all your thoughts. As you watched Jesus walk away, a big yawn overtook you. You feel like a small child whose parents have just kissed them and sent them to bed. You smile slightly as you say to yourself, “I hope I sleep like a baby tonight.”
-Susan
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